to take any word from the dictionary, alter it by adding, subtracting,
or changing one letter, and supply a new definition. Here are the
- Cashtration (n): The act of buying a house, which
renders the subject financially impotent for an indefinite period.
- Intaxication: Euphoria at getting a tax refund, which
lasts until you realize it was your money to start with.
- Reintarnation: Coming back to life as a hillbilly.
- Bozone (n): The substance surrounding stupid people
that stops bright ideas from penetrating. The bozone layer,
unfortunately, shows little sign of breaking down in the near future.
- Foreploy: Any misrepresentation about yourself for the purpose of getting laid.
- Sarchasm: The gulf between the author of sarcastic wit
and the person who doesn't get it.
- Inoculatte: To take coffee intravenously when you are
running late. Finally, a solution!
- Hipatitis: Terminal coolness.
- Karmageddon: It's like, when everybody is, like,
sending off all these really bad vibes, right? And then, like, the Earth
explodes and it's, like, a serious bummer.
- Decafalon (n): The grueling event of getting through
the day consuming only things that are good for you.
- Glibido: All talk and no action. I know some of these people.
- Dopeler effect: The tendency of stupid ideas to seem
smarter when they come at you rapidly.
- Arachnoleptic fit (n): The frantic dance you perform
just after you've accidentally walked through a spider web. And I've done this.
- Beelzebug (n): Satan in the form of a mosquito, that
gets into your bedroom at three in the morning and cannot be cast out.
- Ignoranus: A person who's both stupid and an asshole. Does anything more really need to be said?